Garbage Dumping Thursday...

The only bad thing about garbage dumping Thursday this week is that it is Spring. Which means that it is getting warm. Which means that the garbage man got a treat this week because my husband scaled, gutted, and filleted 75 Perch. Ick...

Here's what I've got:

Anxiety:
I have a touch of anxiety about a few things that I would like to, let's say, develop. I have toyed around, dreamt about, written out, plans to follow through with something that has been on my "To-Do" list, (not so much "Bucket" list per say) for some time now and what's standing in the way you ask; anxiety! I need to barrel through it, run it over and not look back. Stay tuned.
Throwing it away

Pessimism:
In all honesty, I am in a little bit of a low place this week. I finally dragged my butt to the doctor (the kind you only find and have a normal relationship with only after you have had the Dr. from hell!) because unfortunately, I am a little bit injured. I have asked too much of my body and now there isn't even a strike going on in there somewhere. There is no sit in, there is no protest, there is no "Here are our wishes; if you can meet them then we can talk!" There is just a walk out. Plain and simple. No more compromises just plain pulling the plug which leaves me ultra vulnerable, upset, disappointed, and sad. Two words that really shouldn't be used in the same sentence; torn & muscle. You tear a piece of paper. You tear around on a 4 wheeler or a dirt bike. You should never tear a muscle. That's all I've got. Can you sense why I am attempted to tempt the garbage man with my pessimism. No good to feel this negative...
GOT to throw it away

Weekly guilt log:

Remember how I told you I wanted to jet to Boston to see the end of the Boston Marathon to see "my friend" Kara finish what will hopefully be the best race of her life? Well, there is someone else who is on their way to Boston even as we speak (because there are a million of you reading this and everything). I follow a website http://www.mycharmingkids.net/ and the lovely duo that is McKMama and her lovely boy Stellan are on their way to meet and hopefully take care of 1 of the longest races they have been on. I won't go into detail other than if you are the praying type, please pray for no more bumpy road, sunny clear "skies", and a finish that will leave them both exhausted but a happy ending to talk about for years.
I am guilty as charged for being so selfish.

I am wishing that I could see my Grandma more. I talked to her on the phone the other day and in her difficult time that she is going through, this is what she told me; "Oh how I wish I could see you talking to me right now, just hearing your voice just isn't enough." I wanted to cry only because little does she know the feeling is oh so mutual.
Guilt in the highest degree.

On Easter Sunday the Easter bunny brought some M&M's in my sweet little Al's basket. On Monday night someone mysteriously ate ALL said M&M's in my sweet little Al's basket. She found out, there was screaming, and sentiments like, "You didn't ask me if I wanted to share with you! I AM SO ANGRY AT YOU!" (think Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman tone of voice when walking back into the department store)
Big guilt, huge!

Throwing the weekly guilt log away. Ugg...

Another week gone. Another week full of activity, attempts at the impossible, minor "collisions" avoided, and just general getting by and livin. I will dump it in the roll away, recycle the old into some new and move on.
Pushing those clouds away, with a slight limp.

My love, all my love,
your moderately tender friend