Accomplishment + Vulnerability = Human

"Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you and who will help you do the things that you want to do."

I heard Michael Phelps mom tell someone that the other day as she was being interviewed and asked for the millionth time, "What have you told Michael over the years to encourage him?" I find the questions that the media are asking the Olympians to be ridiculously mundane and boring. Asking them, "What does this moment mean to you?" To me, that's like asking them what kind of toothpaste they use or if they prefer Chocolate or Strawberry Quick. I know that they are just doing their job and they are diggin deep for some personal information to get some kind of emotional response that, gulp, might trigger a tear. I suppose its all about the moment, eh?

As a mom I am fascinated with the quick shots to the anxious families that are watching their loved ones compete in the games. Hands to mouth, wide eyes, holding breath and trying to hold still until the end. Hugs all around and arms with clenched fists being pumped in the air in celebration of success. I cannot imagine watching my baby conquer something of this magnitude. I cannot wrap this image around my brain at all since the only things that I have experienced as a spectator in the amazing world of accomplishment in this house is, crawling, walking, coloring, potty training, colors, saying Thank you and No, riding a big boy bike, and how to make a PBJ sans my help. I suppose that it may be pretty similar, to some degree. Being proud is a universal emotion that under all circumstances we react in every font and format. How proud we feel as family and loved ones is of immeasurable magnitude big and small. There is never a wrong or right way to show our true feelings. How fun it is to be witness to families and loved ones celebrating accomplishment. It renews me to see these reactions. I will brace myself for the future of my family and what they will accomplish; big and small. And if NBC is there to document my reaction, I will for sure be as candid and vulnerable as I can.

Yesterday was Happy Cassy Day and as I read what I wrote last year, I am for certain that my mind is in a more peaceful state. I am humbled at the fact that I am now at a point where I can share and be vulnerable enough to expose my feelings. I am impressed and proud that as a 30 year old woman, wife and mother amongst other titles, I am happy with the path that I have chosen. I suppose that this may be a lesson that some people learn over an entire lifetime. I guess that I am just lucky enough to have a bigger piece of the puzzle in place now rather than later. As some of you know, I am not a fan of the sentiment, "You should be so lucky that you/are/have..." I don't need someone to remind me of the things that I posses or should look forward to, or gifts that I have. I understand now a little more than a year ago and certainly more than 8 years ago. I understand and I accept that sometimes in life when you go right you look back and should have probably swung a left. I understand that there is a decent after a long climb; sometimes by the skin of your fingernails. I know for certain that scary still will be be scary no matter what way you look at it. But understanding and moving forward is what I will do. I will continue to train 7 days a week (minus the whole 10,000 caloric intake thing) and hope the people that I surround myself with will bask in the glory of my accomplishments with clenched fists, a wink and a nod to "well done". Such an abundance of scattered thoughts that I only wish I could share in a more clear fashion with you all. None the less you feel what I mean. Being overwhelmed with emotion and being full of emotion is what I do best. Happy Cassy Day
to me.
All is well in this house. Little #3 is going to be moving very soon. School starts in 2 weeks with soccer only a few days later. Life is moving fast, I shall make sure to double knot tight. I will post some new pics soon. Until then...

My love, all my love,
me